Video #7: Joshua Lonergan Sends Kurt Mendelsohn Packing

 

 

     Kurt Mendelsohn has quit LRW Wrestling, and the above music video seems quite appropriate for several reasons. First off, it's interesting to note how toxic people seem to think you'll miss them when they leave. Secondly, I have negative memories of Kurt dating back to days before we ever even met; Kurt was originally scheduled to wrestle in one of the very first LRW productions but he backed out at the last minute, after a nonrefundable, round-trip Greyhound bus ticket from Boston had already been purchased in his name. (No, it wasn't exactly a huge financial loss, but the experience irked me anyway, on principle.)

     Now that I've gotten that off my chest, let's recap the match.

     Video #7's mat introductions went off pretty much as expected. Kurt behaved in his typical braggadocios manner, as rude and blindly aggressive as a young Donald Trump. (I learned that Kurt and Trump even have similar ethnic heritages, by the way.)  By contrast, Joshua played to the camera like a matinee idol, and Kurt seemed annoyed by Joshua's affability.

     Immediately following the intros, the virtuous and slightly naive young man from rural New Hampshire almost made a classic rookie mistake when Kurt extended his hand to Joshua prior to the match. As anyone familiar with pro wrestling realizes, devious "heels" like Mendelsohn invariably launch sneak attacks on unsuspecting "faces" during pre-match handshakes. Had this encounter taken place in the no-rules environment of UCW, Joshua would have been victimized and the Philly crowd would have snickered. However, I immediately rushed to Joshua's side and clued him in about the underhanded tactics of pro wrestling villains. (Joshua seemed grateful to have avoided a cheapshot while Kurt simmered in resentment.)

      Kurt seemed more convinced than ever that the deck was stacked against him when the match's special guest referee was announced -- Sean Evans, whom Kurt had brutalized in LRW Wrestling match #6 to earn his shot at Joshua. (In actually, Sean is a young man of high moral and ethical character who would always take his officiating duties seriously, regardless of whatever personal animosity existed between himself and one of the combatants.)

     From the opening whistle, Joshua dominated Kurt, and the tide never really turned in this match. Occasionally, Kurt would use his size advantage to power out of holds, but the equally strong and more compact Joshua would remain on the attack, keeping Kurt off-balance and under control. 

        About the only times that Kurt could gain a clear advantage occurred when he engaged in ungentlemanly tactics like hair-pulling.

     Kurt attempted several desperate and rather inept pin attempts, during which Joshua had little difficulty keeping one shoulder off the mat. (Following the pin attempt pictured below, a frustrated Kurt resorted to more spiteful hair-pulling.) 

     Prior to this match, Joshua stated that he had been enraged by the unnecessarily rough tactics utilized by Kurt against Sean in our last video. With Sean in close proximity to the action, Joshua appeared almost maniacal as he doled out retribution to Kurt.

     Kurt and Joshua are probably the two strongest, most physically intimidating wrestlers that LRW Wrestling has ever presented. Often these two combatants resembled bulls locking horns in an epic struggle. 

      As the match wore on, Kurt increasingly showed signs of fatigue, and Joshua was able to manhandle his larger opponent.

     In a display of intestinal fortitude, Kurt was able to endure a camel clutch. With his last ounce of strength, Kurt finally powered out of Joshua's expertly applied maneuver.

     However, Joshua was relentless in his attack, and he trapped Kurt in the same maneuver less than a minute later.

      This time, Kurt was pushed beyond the limit of his endurance, and Mr. Invincibility tapped out. (Actually, this was a violation of the LRW Wrestling rules, which state: "To submit to an opponent, a wrestler must say, "I quit," clearly and audibly, in that exact term. Tapping the mat or using any other phraseology will not be sufficient to stop the match." However, I did not specifically mention this rule to Sean prior to the match, and continuing to apply this painful, somewhat dangerous hold after Kurt's submission would have served no purpose.)

     During the postmatch interviews, to make up for sparing Kurt the humiliation of verbalizing his submission, I mocked and ridiculed his "Invictus Maneo" tattoo (which, at that point, amounted to false advertising). Thin-skinned Kurt then proclaimed his decision to quit LRW Wrestling, and stormed out of the room. By contrast, Joshua was a complete gentleman during his interview, and he promised to wrestle for LRW again in the future.

     Now, for those of you who, for some incredible reason, have not yet purchased this video, let's take care of business...

     This extremely fast-paced video is 11 minutes and 18 seconds long. That includes the 8 minute, 39 second actual match (along with wrestler introductions), plus a brief, postmatch interview with each combatant.
     To purchase the HIGH DEFINITION, 1.51 GB, 1920 x 1080 version of this video in the PC-friendly .wmv format for a mere $13.99 -- utilize the BUY NOW button below...

NOTE: If you do not have a top tier, ultra high speed internet connection, the download time for this version may be considerable. Also, a successful download via moderate or slow internet speeds may require several attempts. Those without extremely high speed internet connections may wish to download the Standard Definition version available via the link below. (At any rate, it is always recommended that you close all other programs when downloading video files.)

     To purchase the STANDARD DEFINITION, 541 MB, 1920 x 1080 version of this video in the quickly and easily downloadable, hugely popular .mp4 format for a mere pittance of $9.95 -- utilize the BUY NOW button below...

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(The LRW Wrestling Locker Room page has been updated to reflect the result of this match.)